Showing posts with label comeback post. Show all posts
Showing posts with label comeback post. Show all posts

Saturday, November 17, 2012

The year that was mine.

Entirely mine.

So here's what was going on while I went on blog-hiatus. Gak, these days (months, more like), everytime I blog, the post is by default a comeback post.
  • My IIMK life has come to an end. (Tragic sigh follows)
  • Which also means that my hostel life is over. Phew!
  • Niqah over (I know I make it sound like an army commander reporting about a completed mission. That's how I felt once the hullabaloo had died down.)
  • My heart wants a sabbatical, my brain wants other stuff.
Yeah, I wanted to do this post couple of weeks back, but like everything else I plan, this one got pushed down the procrastinated-pipeline-of-things-I-totally-have-to-be-doing-already.

Living Alone
Fending for myself in a new city was daunting, sometimes even aggravating in the start. Especially when you are a lazy bum and a geographically retarded bum at that, like me. Fun nevertheless. I could make impulsive decisions and just go buy stuff when I fancied so. I could do crazy stuff and just be me, and not worry, since hey- no one cares! And the beauty of earning and spending it on my family and myself. I still remember receiving my first paycheck. Great day!

And haunting the second hand book store. It became my favorite haunt in all of Calicut after IIMK. Thanks to Rahul!

Roomie love
Sure this life came with its baggage. My colleague and I had joined together, and lived together. Boy was that mad. We're as unlike each other as possible. To the point where if I like something, I know she'll hate it, and vice versa. We couldn't stand each other's lifestyle. So when she moved out after getting a new job- the move practically saved our friendship. Ridunkulus as that may sound. See, some relationships are like that. It's better not to spend too much time together in such cases cos that will just ruin things.

Anyway, I made a truckload of friends at my hostel. A motley crowd in fact. They came and they went. Some stayed longer thanks to their respective exams or courses, some lasted only weeks before they ran from the crap food and kleptomaniacs that infest the hostel. But despite the number of days they spent there, I fell in love with all the girls who were unlucky/lucky? enough to be my roommates. Some were strong, intelligent and outspoken and awesome like my first roomie Amu. Some were whimsical like Luna Lovegood (Leah!). Some were mature and sametime crazy like Christie. Whichever way, all beautiful, all amazing.

Coming back, main point of the whole crazy hostel life:
I lasted a whole year!
It's definitely something to be proud of, kid. I survived bad food, consequent sicknesses, forthmentioned creepy kleptomaniacs and more.

Niqah-
ok, I'mma be brief about this cos ceremonies and social functions ain't my thing. And the Niqah just emphasised that fact. I love being around my family. Extended family included. I unconditionally love them all no matter how weird or flawed they may be. They're family. Everything's forgiven.
Anyway, my Niqah event was crazy fun thanks to this extended family. We came together as one single unit, had fun, goofed around and in general- had a great time. What I didn't love was the dress-up part. SO not me.

And the wedding songs that I usually am ok with when singing for someone else getting married. But when it's me they are singing to, I'm actually yawning! I can't stand the cheesier than cheesy lyrics (try this: "the girl blushed as they made her wear the pretty flowers". Gaaaaah. Seriously? Seriously? I'm supposed to not laugh at that??!)They're fun as long as you don't sing em to me!

 But it was fun watching my cousins and mom and dad and the photographer who came plead and beg me to Smile like a girl would smile dammit! All I could muster was my half-smile/smirk.
And here's proof that I've had the same smile ever since I was a wee bratty kid. (I was a brat. A spoilt one at that)
Le smirky face
They wanted something else. I tried a grin, but that was ruled out as unwholesome. How? Was it an alligator laugh? Or you find the girl seeming like she's on dope? Maybe it's the second. Or maybe it's just me. Siiiiiigh.



IIM aka Heaven aka Para-para-paradise
Saving the bias for last.
Like I mentioned, my IIM phase is over. And that's a huge void that will never get filled up. Ever. This is where I need a melodramatic emoticon to express all my melancholy and pain at departure from said heaven.
 
    This is where I got over the trauma I had received from my dept head from post grad years. ok, I really want to say awful things about him, but I realize I'll just be damaging myself, so I refrain.
     This is where I grew into a confident, self-assured, strong person. Most of that had gotten wiped off the slate from the above mentioned miserable black hole of a human.
     This is where I lived in an awesomely happy environment, great colleagues and superiors and had the luck to work under the Most Amazing, The Person I Respect Most, Perfection Personified, Frikkin' Amazing Guru - aka, my Boss. Or in simpler terms, the Chief Librarian & Information Officer plus a million other titles he works by. I'm still awed by his humility despite how genius he is. He could have been a mean pig, but he chose to be awesome. Respect.
    This is where I perfected my work ethic and realized I'm a quick learner and pretty sharp at my job. Yay! Major ego boost.
    And how can I forget! This is where I got the chance to meet greats like RBI Governor, ministers of Kerala Cabinet and all. 
    This is where I fell in love with the awesomeness of Tumblr too. And also found and fell irretrievably in love with The Ultimate Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy.
    This is where I fell in love over and over AND over again with a place. I don't think words can do justice to how unbelievably heavenly my work place is.
See what I'm going on an on about?
The clean, clean, cold air. The long walks downhill, the adorable workplace friends (I love you allllllll!), the everyday joy of going to work here!, and the fact that we get to work in a place where the work ethic mostly consists of 'do your work. no need to stress out. is all.'/ I'm pretty sure I'm forgetting the finer points.
But oh well, one can never explain beauty. Only attempt and fail.

I just made a point to take a mental snapshot of my paradise before I left. (cries into pillow)

   

Friday, April 20, 2012

The long-overdue post. The brace-yourselves-for-the-next post

Anyaseyo all! (that's hello in Korean, duh. I just wanted to start off on a random and different note)

So! A post has been overdue and I've been frikkin' busy what with having the unique luck of being assigned to two departments in the same month. Which means, I'm working ALL the time since I gotta do the stuff in THIS department, and by the time I'm tired, it's lunch and post-lunch, work for the next department. Yay, life can be exhausting AND fun all at once. So obviously I like it when I'm working, ergo-no complaints. BUT! that also by default means that NO SLACK TIME for poor me. Draw in a sad face of me while you're at it.

Mostly, this post is a filler and to brace you for the next post, which is NOT gonna be an easy read. Why? I'm usually a happy-go-lucky person, never badmouths even the meanest kid 'round the block and generally my posts resonate with the wonderful things I'm going through. You can ignore the "bad day" posts of mine since they're rare and sad. Anyway, the next post is like- whaddayacallems?- urban poetry?
No rhyme to the poem, but lotsa reason.

It's about one of the only two persons I hate loathe on this world. That's intense and I didn't really want to blog about the way I'm feeling (nay,repressing) about the darkness emanated by said person. But then I realized, dayum, if I don't vent about it, I might die suffocated by all the bad thoughts and it's always better to share everything here. Where else could I do that?

To quote a drama,
"Share if it's good news, so that the happiness multiplies.
Share if it's bad news, so that the hurt/pain can be halved/lessened."
True that!


EDIT- I decided after posting this and ruminating quite a bit, that hating on someone no matter how hateful, just brings me down to their level. Not very helpful. So cheer me on about my new decision to just post the next post and I'mma try to get over the bad feelings and stay neutral (like my darling Riff told me to, yday) regarding everything hateful. Not gonna exert myself over something awful anymore people!

Saturday, January 21, 2012

This one goes out to you. And you. And her. And him.

This one's for those friends of mine,

rare finds
who stand out in any crowd.
The ones who've stood up for me,
Held me when I cried,
Hugged me while I died inside.


Made my day 
when it was otherwise so mundane.
Loved me and reminded me
of all the awesomeness I'd forgotten about me.


Yeah,
This post is for those amazing friends
who made my day, week, month and the year.
And off we start 2012.
Belated happy new year fellow-wookies!






Because I love you,
And will stay so,
Things are easy.
Questions are answered to,
Problems solved.

Because I am so,
and can't be helped otherwise,
I'd rather the world understand.
Let me be,
Let me rise.

And now that I know you're hurt the same,
Please don't protest, deny or blame.

Good feelings grow,
They will finally show-
The world's not such a bad place afterall.

Life's worth living,
Hugs happily shared
and smiles easily passed on.

So we'll hold hands,
Roll the roads and rivers
that keep us apart
into nothingness;

and I'll hold your hand tighter-
'cos friends like you
are godsends,
one of a kind,
and were custom-made for me!






Thursday, September 29, 2011

Waving goodbyes, trying not to cry, trying to blot out misery

Omg.
I must have totally lost my mojo. How else do I explain spending over  2 months away from blogging, and still not regretting that?
I've been the laziest bum that ever was let astray on the face of earth and I've been watching; NAY; marathoning dramas, series and movies like the world's ending the very next day. well, it might. but that wasn't my point anyway.

So..
I'm done with my post-grad years. I'm still contemplating research, but not gonna go down that road for a couple o' years anyway.

Thinking back to these last 2 years still makes me feel awfully queasy. or specifically, that week. Uh, yeah i get it that i'm not exactly making sense- but it will when you read on.

All these years as a student- be it at elementary school, high school, college and beyond- i've been one of those goody-two-shoes kind of student. May not have come out first place during school- but I was always loved by teachers. Never exactly did anything wrong, and i was favorite student for quite a lot of my teachers. I'm not kidding when i say that even after all these years, some of them still talk about me with a smile on their face to their current students. ACCEPT IT! I WAS THAT NICE!

Why am I ranting on when it's obviously making lesser and lesser sense?

Hm, let's just say there's someone who feels that way. Ok, i'll just refer to him/her as Someone in this post for now. Someone is temperamental to begin with. Volatile emotions and highly oscillating mood-swings. So one moment Someone is being nice and talking well with me. Next thing I know, I'd called up Someone to confirm stuff about a job offer s/he made to me. Let's just say s/he was planning on making me and another classmate low paid guest lecturers. Like, real dirt cheap. Which was also probably why the call never went the way it should have.

I has said just one sentence to Someone, in English, to keep it polite and formal, unless s/he found me to being rude to their face. Yeah, one has to keep  literally a million things in mind before saying a word to this person. I swear. S blows up right in my face (ear) about how I'm being rude (cos allegedly i spoke throughout the call in English, being distant [WTH? are u kidding me?]), mean, disgusting and to just refuse the job offer if I weren't interested.

Truth is, I'm interested. And S is my teacher. But S didn't even bother answering whether S would be covering for my travel expenses even. Youch. #worstphonecallever
and since he blew out in a rage w/o answering on the pay, my family guesses they weren't gonna pay me much. probably lesser than less.
i cried.

So next time I went with classmates to collect certificates and get the hell outta that place, I knew i'd be facing the wrath of something I knew I didnt deserve. Boy, was I right.

Things said to me:
  • I'm the worst student ever in S's entire life.
  • I'm mercenary (not the exact word, but all the paragraphs worth of ranting s/he spewed in my face amounts to that word I'd say)
  • I should get the hell outta here if i'm expecting same pay scale as guest lecturers.
  • etc etc etc painful stuff.
I kind of cried again right there. Yeah, call me out on being softie, but I can't handle allegations that maketh no sense. I know S can be angry and then go back to nice real quick. Not in my case. Not yet anyway. I also know S regularly abuses every subordinate and hurls fierce insults at them in public. Yeah, not exactly a well-loved person in there I'd say.

Good to have finally gotten out of there. There were great friends, good teachers, beautiful memories.. But why did the ending have to be so messy ?


Anyway,
goodbye my pg years, and dept
adieu,
alvida,
annyeong,
and every other way to finally sever ties with that horrid memory.

Waving goodbyes,
I'll Trying to keep from crying
Closing a chapter of life,
Blotted by black memories and white.

{
o my! that was so spontaneous! *must work on it}

PS- Gilsha, you're an amazing friend whom I never want to lose. Sorry for all the times I may have been mean to you. Forgive me =)

PPS- and no, i didn't take up that job offer. in case you were wondering. not worth the insults i'd've to face anyway.

Thursday, March 17, 2011

The constant push-and-pull I engage you in..

So things have come to a point where every heart-to-heart I try to have with Blog boils down to the Awkward category. This one was no different..

Blog [who's in an aggravated mood thanks to my frequent absence]: Oh lookie lookie, who's come along now after ignoring me blatantly all this month and more?
Me [feeling ashamed]: Yeah love, you have every right to feel that way. Punish me as much as you want, but please don't leave me!
Blog [not as yet in a forgiving mood]: Why the hell are you back though? Exam season approacheth i bet!
Me[feeling cornered and caught]: Riiiiiiiiight. What else but deadlines could bring me running back into your arms these horrid days?
Blog [depressed,yet happy to have me back]: Dayum. You could've at least tried to sound romantic about the running back into my arms/wings/side bars part.

*

Back! 

Saturday, January 1, 2011

1/1/'11

exactly my plan for coming year. NO!! it's not any obvious hint towards running away or something as idiotic. 
What am I? 15??
I just want to travel more! See more places, find the peace, bring in more creativity and joy.

1/1/'11 is here finally!


 As for new year wishes,

Not much to say, 'cept wish everyone a happy, happy, REALLY happy year ahead.I never was much into ceremonies. I'm unceremonious even in the required times.
Which is why new years do't mean much, neither do resolutions.But sometimes you totally have to promise yourself some stuff.

My resolution #1 [and the only one really] as regards my blog: Less comebacks and more posts. 

Yes! Cheer for me so that I don't end up breaking this word!

***
What was 2010 for me?
Apart from being extremely busy, over-straining myself and breaking down in the process;
I went places,
Learnt more stuff,
Have gotten much more patient [or so methinks]
and watched tonnes of Korean stuff.

The good:
  1. Samsung died on me and I switched to Nokia ExpressMusic.
  2. Had several meetups with the Girlfriends-of-the-{add several, several} millenia. Last one was yesterday. Awesome!
  3. Uncle's housewarming.
  4. Subscribed to the awesomest Indian magazine out there-The Tehelka.
  5. Almost forgot- lots happening for The Downtroddence [will post on them soon. real soon!]!!

Sad things?

  1. More people got married and drifting away
  2. Friends and friends' family getting abused, cheated upon and divorced. =(
  3. Read lesser books cos of lack of time SLASH lack of time management.
  4. And another favorite girlfriend moves out o town. =( But she's doing really fine, so- w00t!
  5. .Deaths, suicides.
  6. Most of my Eids and my Christmas this year were ruined thanks to effing-aptly timed exams. Dang!
  7. The kitten I saw getting killed by some stray dog. Could do absolutely nothing to save it. Had to watch it die.

Another to-do for 2011-
Meet at least ONE blogger buddy. We'll see how that turns out. =/




PS- and don't forget! 2010 was The year of Rajni! ynna rascala...! ;) I don't know about you, but I think he's one of the humblest actors out there in all of Indian tinseltown

Friday, June 11, 2010

Comback #999999111101 or something

Lord, do I make the highest number of comebacks or what? Anyway, here's what's been keeping me busy for the last 2 months: a departmental tour that lasted a week, internship in a no-internet zone for 3 weeks and then the bane of all students: The exams.

But now everything's over!!!!! I'm freeeeeeeeeee! and hold your breath, here it comes: I'm back!!!!!!!!!! [I can almost read the thoughts on the reader's mind: yeah, back again! and then everyone rolls their eyes at me]

Planning an avalanche of posts, so this post is more like a warning prior to the avalanche.

And have I told you? I love ye all! I've taken 4 books from library, and hopes to perform a much required CPR on my other blog. I know it's probably too late, but perhaps a miracle will help?

*Cheers  \m/